The Ex Girlfriend

It finally happened. We talked openly about her. This post will probably be a jumble of a post, it was a jumble of a talk, but bear with me.

I know she is pretty, and skinny, but I always felt like he was more in love with her than he is with me, and I wanted to know why. I want that crazy falling head over heels. That 100%. I feel like I'm all in and he's holding back. And the way he doesn't like to talk about her, I feel like there's a part of him that still likes her. Like I've given him my whole heart, and he's given me his with a piece missing; a piece that she still has. I told him all this.

He said that he does have a hole in his heart. That it was a very hard breakup and she had issues and he felt responsible for a lot of them (even though they weren't his fault). She had troubles with thinking about suicide and was suspected bipolar. And he said he and his family had known her and her family long before they started dating, so they had always been friends. So even though he never wanted to be near her or see her again, he did still care about her and hope that she is ok and that she is happy.

He said it wasn't that she still had a piece of his heart, but that his heart had a hole. He said he was falling, but he was also bracing himself and catching himself as he went along, because he didn't want to fall that hard again.`

I asked him what he wanted me to do to be prettier, funnier, a better girlfriend. What can I change to make him never want to leave. He said nothing. Don't do anything different. Except recover. Get rid of Ana (or Mia or Ed. I guess it's been all 3).

It was hard, but I think we're both glad we did it. With all the problems I've been having trying to compete with her and all the problem's he's been having when I am an ass and bring her up, it needed to be talked about.