Had coffee with a friend this morning who is also in the Exercise Physiology department and is a recovered bulimic. It's nice to talk to someone who understands sometimes and can share their personal experiences, as well as maybe some tips and support. An ED is a very lonely thing, and having someone who knows what you're going through to talk to is rare, because people don't normally talk about it. But he's been a huge blessing to me and a source of encouragement.
At the same time, even though he is recovered, I know he still struggles immensely and still has disordered behavior, so it makes me question if you can ever truly recover. While he is at peace with his body and how it is, he still engages in the obsessive habits and the measuring and counting and structure, eating the same thing every day and exercising on a set schedule. And if he's invited out to eat or deviates from his schedule some way, it makes him very nervous. It almost makes me want to ask him to lunch sometime and see what happens with me freaking out and him freaking out and both of us totally out of our comfort zones. It might be a little humorous. Maybe I'll ask him =) What the hell, lets do something rebellious and crazy and go out to lunch! I'm not sure how on board with that he'd be.
Did some homework for Nutrition class and Kinesiology. Both seem to be super triggering. Being told to choose low fat milk and cheese and yogurt when my dietician is telling me the opposite. I'm trying not to let it validate the Ana mindset. I went shopping today and got my normal full fat cheese and peanut butter and frozen berries. And they had brussel sprouts today! Yay! I had some for lunch.
Played basketball with the guys yesterday and was the only girl on the court. Got a lot of girl jokes. I guess I'm used to it though. A friend nicknamed me "ostrich legs" and says he has bigger boobs than I do. The sad thing is it's kinda true. But I'm still better at basketball than he is =)
Guys hate it when you beat them at sports. One guy started to really go for it once I stepped on the court. The others congratulated him on the hard shots. He said he was motivated because a girl was watching.
Second week of school starts tomorrow. I'm kinda tired, but trying to gear myself up.
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