Had a hard time last night. Really struggling. Very afraid of what's going to happen. I'm terrified my boyfriend will leave me. I would relapse so badly if that happened. Heck, who am I kidding, I'm already relapsing. I know it sounds really pathetic, but my boyfriend is completely my backbone right now. I would tank without him.
It is pathetic, but I don't know what else to do.
Have you ever had where you see or hear or learn something and all of a sudden you can't breathe, like something's knocked the wind out of you? Like someone stuck a vacuum down your throat and is sucking all the air out of your lungs and the beat out of year heart? Like an actual physiological feeling?
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